Grief is described as deep sorrow, especially that caused by someone’s death. There are seven stages of grief. Although grief is different for everyone that experiences it, in general people go through the same general feelings in dealing with it.

The first stage is denial. When a person loses someone at first most people feel denial. That there is no possible way they could be gone. They feel like it should be some kind of cruel joke, like they have to be lying. There needs to be some terrible misunderstanding because there is just no way it could be the truth.

The second stage is pain and guilt. Once they have accepted that it is the truth they will feel the pain. “That’s the thing about pain, it demands to be felt,” wrote John Green.  They will feel every little bit of it, all of the hurt that is brought from death. The person sometimes feels like there is something they could have done, or like it should have been you that died. They just know it should not have been the person who did.

The third stage is anger. Once the person gets through that pain they can become angry. Angry at the world, angry at how unfair it all is. They will feel angry at the person for leaving, or at the world for letting it happen. Some people will even feel angry at their God and question their faith because they do not understand why they would take someone they loved.

The fourth stage is depression and reflection. The person grieving will feel depressed. They can be like this for days, weeks, or even months. Depression is a prolonged feeling of sadness and helplessness, like nothing can bring you out of this feeling. It is common after losing someone to feel this way.

The fifth stage is the upward turn. After a person feels all of the hurt and pain from the grief they will start to make a turn. The depression will subside, and they will be able to look at the better. It will be a feeling of relief when they start to see the light again.

The sixth stage is reconstruction. Once a person starts to turn for the better they will start working on being happy. They will learn slowly how to cope with it from day to day. The pain never really gets better but this is the stage when most people start to be able to live with it. It may take a while, but they are healing.

The seventh and final stage is acceptance. Eventually the person will accept that they are indeed gone, and that they have to live their lives without them. They will start to understand that it is a part is just a part of life, but they can get through it. The person will learn to live without the person. They never forget, and they will still feel these stages throughout their lives when they think of the lost one but they have learned how to adapt with the pain.

Grief is a long process that everyone goes through at some point in their lives. It is hard and many people do not know how to process it. It can be worked through. It takes time but eventually they can live their normal lives after accepting the pain.